


You're Here Now

by CirqueBordello (CircusTalia)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Begging, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, I was given permission to use someone else's fan character for this fic, Nightmares, Overstimulation, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Steve's not actually in the fic, and plays a big role in the nightmare scene, but he is mentioned throughout
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-26 16:04:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21376801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CircusTalia/pseuds/CirqueBordello
Summary: Bucky and Jenna are ready to start their new lives, but memories of the past come to haunt Bucky. Luckily, he doesn't have to go through it alone.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 4





	You're Here Now

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was commissioned by Anonymous. Thank you, Anonymous, for the support!

The last thing he saw as he fell out of the train was his best friend. The next time he would wake up, his arm was replaced with metal. He wasn’t alive as he held the sniper in his hands and aimed at the target within shot. He was going along with the motions. Every target was indistinguishable. Their cries and the panic around them was the same as the flies’ buzz. 

He didn’t know he had died until he took a visit to the museum. A familiar face stared back at him. And his name was Bucky.

Suddenly, those cries grew in volume. The once indistinguishable forms took shape and their faces had reactions before and after the shot. The red that was once used to indicate if the shot had been made was now the blood that stained his hands. 

Bucky fell out of the train as he did back when he died. Except when he woke up again, he wasn’t with HYDRA. Rather, he was chained and in the middle of a floor, his wrists and ankles bound with a glaring light over him. What circled around him were the faces of the heroes the Earth held in high regard. Among them was a victim of his crimes: a young boy whose mom and dad he had killed moments ago. The young boy was now a man and he was ready to declare him an enemy to mankind, hatred and mourning burning in that man’s eyes.

Bucky apologized over and over again. He insisted that the victims he killed were not of his own accord. He was manipulated and he lost his mind when his body had been retrieved by the enemy.

“Really?” A familiar voice spoke. 

Bucky turned around to see Steve. Steve wasn’t adorned in his Captain America get-up. He was just Steve. 

Bucky repeated his name, only for Steve to interrupt him.

“You’re an enemy to the world, Winter Soldier.”

Bucky shook his head. “No. I...I don’t even know what I had been doing-”

“Innocent people died because of you!” Steve shouted.

Bucky flinched. “Steve, please-”

“Cut the bullshit, Soldier,” another, more feminine voice said. 

Bucky’s eyes grew wide as he looked to see a tall, light-skinned woman with her curly brown hair flowing down her back and wearing a black and dark blue uniform with an emblem on the side and a quiver of arrows and a bow that hung over her shoulder. Her glasses accentuated her hazel eyes and they held no mercy as they looked straight at him.

“Jenna?” 

Jenna rolled her eyes.

“Jenna,” she mockingly repeated. “Give up the act, Soldier,” she said more seriously. “To think you were once a patriot that inspired the Captain America. Look at you now: you’ve become Hydra’s bitch and you’re nothing without their help.”

“Jenna, you don’t really believe that, do you?”

Jenna shook her head. “I don’t believe you, Winter Soldier. Hell will be a lot easier on you if you just accept what you are.” She waltzed over to him and whispered in his ear. “A murderer.”

The word hung in the air. It was said softly and yet it pierced Bucky.

“No! Jenna! Steve!” Bucky tried to call out to them, but Jenna moved away from him and stood beside Steve. Bucky spun around before latching effortlessly onto whatever platform he was on. His fingers were slipping. The cold pierced his real hand as his robotic hand spilled blood. 

He screamed as he fell down to the icy depths of Hell.

  
  


He screamed as he shot up from the bed.

“Bucky?” Jenna turned on the lamp on the nightstand, picking up her glasses and looking up to her boyfriend who was dressed in a tank top and grey sweatpants. “Bucks, what’s wrong?”

Bucky got out of their bed and paced back and forth in their room. It was a fairly modest room, a part of the apartment they had recently moved into. Neither really had a place of their own prior to the battle against Thanos. After essentially dying and being brought back to life, Bucky’s crimes had been pardoned thanks to T’Challa making negotiations with the United Nations and providing evidence of Bucky being cured from HYDRA control. 

While the governments of the world remained apprehensive and on high-alert to Bucky’s behavior, they agreed that as long as he was checked on regularly that he could be employed with S.H.I.E.L.D., allowing him and Jenna to have their own place. 

The couple were getting adjusted to the apartment. To having a place to call their own. They knew it was a safe place and inconspicuous to any prying eyes. But that didn’t do much to protect Bucky from his nightmares. His PTSD was something that would never truly go away. 

Jenna knew that. And she stood there, waiting for him to speak so she could listen and figure out how to help him in that moment.

“I fell out of the train. I was doing Hydra’s dirty work and then the Avengers looked down on me, judging me for everything I had done. Tony was there. And Steve. And-” He looked over to Jenna and let out a deep breath, covering his eyes and shaking his head.

Jenna slipped out of bed and walked over to Bucky.

“Hey, it’s okay,” she said slowly approached him, giving him room to breathe. “Take nice easy breaths for me.”

Bucky took one breath in and one out. Jenna eyed him up and down, hesitant to make another step before going forward, placing a hand over his shoulder.

“It’s okay, Bucks,” she told him. “You’re not the Winter Soldier. You’re not a part of HYDRA. You’re you.” 

Bucky sighed, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. 

Jenna patted his back. 

“Jenna…,” he looked at the wall ahead of him that had a shelf and pictures of various memorabilia of the two. Framed photos of their time in Wakanda. Various items from the 1940s, including an old soldier’s cap. Prop weapons that were for show (and a few that did have a bit of power to them). An assortment of fliers and pamphlets designed for people who were gone during the Snap period, many of them including resources on how to reintegrate into society and what happened in the world while they were gone. “The Snap...did we…”

Jenna soothed his back. It wasn’t easy for her to admit. Half the universe experienced what they went through, but that didn’t make it any easier to understand. Time moved on without them. Or rather, they defied the laws of life. 

“Yes, Bucks. We were gone for five years.” She pulled back, placing her hands on his face. “But we’re here again. Everything’s changed and we can start new lives. Together.”

Bucky nodded, but it was a nod that acknowledged her words without being convinced of what she said. Jenna sighed and grabbed his hands. 

“Come on. Let’s get you some water.”

She took him to the kitchen where she flipped the switch to turn on the light. It was very simple, with a fruit bowl on the counter with apples and oranges and a refrigerator with a water and ice filter next to the stove. Jenna had him sit down by the counter while she opened a cabinet to grab a glass and pressed it against the refrigerator door to pour water into it. She handed the glass over to Bucky, who accepted it and took a sip. 

Jenna had her arms crossed over the counter and looked at him playfully.

“Now, Mr. Barnes,” she said in a playful tone, “as your guide to all things current and futuristic, it is in my professional opinion that you need to take your time to familiarize yourself with this new, new future.”

Bucky chuckled. 

“Jenna, I wasn’t stuck in an ice cube for half a century, unlike a certain soldier I know.”

“Well, Mr. Barnes, that may be so, but you are still clearly out of touch with reality and look far too young than your actual age,” she adjusted her glasses. “Why don’t you tell me what you do know.”

Bucky ran his thumb over his glass of water. 

“I know how to pick up a gun and shoot someone.” 

“That’s great!” Jenna said. “I personally prefer the bow and arrow, though if I had to shoot something at you, it wouldn’t be an arrow.” She gave him a wink.

Bucky couldn’t hold back his laughter.

“I know that’s not what you said to Fury when he interviewed you.”

“We are talking about what you know about yourself, Mr. Barnes,” Jenna replied, her face red with embarrassment as she thought about how she would be killed if she had dared to say anything like that Nick Fury or anyone that wasn’t her boyfriend. 

Bucky looked down at the water and the tile of the counter.

“I know that my memories will never fully go away,” his tone became more grave. “That I shouldn’t be here or if I can be here, it shouldn’t be like this.” 

Jenna extended her hands to his and he grabbed them.

“I know I’ve hurt a lot of people. I’ve broken up families and friendships. I’ve made people scared.” He squeezed her hands. “But I also know that I wouldn’t be where I am today if I didn’t get help.” His eyes moved to meet hers. “And that you were one of my biggest supporters to get me the help I need.” He caressed her knuckles. “You never gave up on me. You never turned me away when I opened up about my problems. And you’re here with me now. I can’t think of anyone else that I could imagine myself with.” He brought her knuckles to his lips and kissed them.

Jenna smiled. 

“You know what I could imagine?”

Bucky raised an eyebrow, knowing that whatever she was going to say would lead to trouble.

“What can you imagine?”

Jenna slipped her hands out of Bucky’s grasp and put them over his cheeks. 

“I can imagine you and I in our bed and working on a for-sure fire way to get you to sleep.” 

Bucky laughed. He moved to the other side of the counter, picking Jenna up and carrying her back to bed.

Jenna wasn’t wearing the most erotic of PJs, donning an old tee and wearing men’s boxers for underwear. She didn’t care for nightgowns or sleeping in crop tops or loose booty shorts. Bucky didn’t care what she wore either as he got them settled back in bed, his arms around her waist and his head snuggled at the crest of her neck.

Jenna put her hands over his.

“You know I was thinking of something else when I said we could work on getting you to sleep.”

“I know,” Bucky replied, his metal arm slipping underneath her shirt and caressing her stomach. “But you feel as soft as a teddy bear.”

“Do not,” Jenna flipped over, bringing up a pillow and playfully hitting Bucky’s face. 

“Okay. Your as soft as a stuffed alligator.”

“Stop!” Jenna laughed, hitting him softly again. She dropped the pillow, looking into his eyes before closing her own and letting themselves kiss each other. 

Bucky moved his hands down her waist, slipping the boxers off of her. Jenna’s face flushed. Bucky’s fingers caressed over her thigh. 

“Bucks,” she was about to turn her head over when Bucky put a hand over her head, keeping her head down.

“This is what you wanted, right?” His other hand moved over to hover his fingers over her crotch area. “Wasn’t this your suggestion?”

Jenna sucked in a breath as Bucky kept his fingers just above her clit.

“Bucks...please…” she tried to move her hands down, only for Bucky to move the hand that was on her head over to her wrists. She gave a soft moan at being held down. 

“I’m starting to think your suggestion was more for yourself than for me,” Bucky teased, his hand that was over her clit moving up to cup her breasts. 

“Bucky,” she moaned, her breath growing warm. 

“You want it?” Bucky whispered in her ear.

“Y-yes,” Jenna sucked in a breath before Bucky pinched her nipple.

“Beg for it.” 

Jenna bit her lip, determined not to let him win. She’d resist as much as she could, especially if he was gonna be a dick about it. But she couldn’t hold in her moans as he played around with her breasts and grinded against her. She felt the hard on from the fabric of his underwear that was pressed on her. This asshole was getting turned on by her predicament.

“You ready to beg now?” Bucky asked, letting his hand drop from her breast and rest right next to her.

“Bastard...I thought you were trying to sleep…”

“I was,” Bucky paused his grinding to flip her on her stomach. “But this is way too much fun.”

Jenna pouted, only to see Bucky’s free hand move to take her glasses off and set them back on the nightstand. Even when he was being a tease, he still made sure she was comfortable. The truth was, Jenna could put a stop to this at any time. Not solely because she’s an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. and had the training to take down practically anyone that was human, but because she knew she could let Bucky know when to put a serious stop to this and he would oblige. It was one of the many topics they discussed when their relationship became serious. They had even gone over it again when things settled and they were ready to start their new lives.

Jenna gave a low growl and put her head down on the sheet. She hated giving in, but Bucky knew the right actions to take to get her vulnerable.

“Fine, y’win,” she mumbled.

“Couldn’t hear that, sweetheart. Wanna say that a bit more clearly?” 

Bucky loosened his grip on her and watched as she turned her head to the side, her hair falling over her face. He moved it out of her way, staring down at her lovingly.

God, she hated how turned on she was with all of this.

“Bucks, I am begging you,” she pleaded. “Please, _ please  _ fuck me.”

Bucky grinned. 

“Just a little bit longer, okay?” He removed his hand from her wrists groping her breasts again, this time with his hands over her shirt. 

Jenna tensed up as he massaged her chest, his leg moved atop of hers and slid up and down her exposed skin. She closed her eyes and bit her lower lip, taking in the sensations. She felt herself leaking with cum, but she knew saying something would lead to Bucky teasing her more. 

Instead, she held it in as much as possible. Her body trembled as he continued to grind against her, kissing her ear and down her neck. 

“Fuck, Bucks…”

He sucked on her neck, making her gasp. Between the rubbing of the fabric on her skin and Bucky’s lips pursed on her neck to the squishing of her chest, Jenna let out a moan and cum streamed down her private area.

Bucky let go of her for a moment, putting her on her back and moving on top of her.

“It’s okay, Jenna,” he said. “I’ve got you.”

His sweatpants and underwear were pulled down to reveal the hard on he received from toying with her. He pulled his tank top over his head and tossed it aside, not caring where it landed. They held hands as Bucky slipped his cock inside her and pleasured her as she desired.

After their little escapade, Jenna pulled out a paper towel from one of the drawers, wiping off the cum from their skins. She disposed of the paper towel to the trash can that was across the bed, heading to the bathroom to wash her hands. Bucky removed the covers to replace them with new ones, the stained ones being moved next to the hamper in the corner of the room. 

The two did a quick rinse of their bodies before changing into new pajamas and hopping on to bed. They both faced each other on the bed, tired but happy. 

“You know what makes this new life harder to comprehend?” Bucky pressed his fingers down on a pillow.

“That you’re now five years younger than the folks at the retirement home?” Jenna playfully answered.

“Not that,” Bucky shook his head with a smile, being unable to resist her playful nature. He took a moment to recompose himself and became serious. “That I’m gonna live a new life without anyone from my old one.” 

Bucky and Jenna’s fingers caressed over each other.

“Bucks.”

Bucky looked to her.

Jenna held a lot of respect for Steve Rogers. She was envious of the friendship between him and Bucky. They made friendship look so easy even when the rest of the world was tearing them apart. 

She hadn’t been there to see Steve return as his true age. She received a brief report about it and Bucky filled in the details. She knew wherever he was, he’d prefer to be left alone with very little company, which she could understand. But from what she saw, she knew Steve would want his friends to live the lives they never had the chance to experience. 

“You know Steve’s proud of what you’ve done. And he wants you to start fresh without your past weighing you down.” 

Bucky gave a nod, this one both understanding and accepting of her words. 

“Jenna.”

“Yeah?”

“What’s it gonna take for you to abandon me?”

Jenna smiled, caressing his face. 

“It’s gonna take a lot more than waking me up in the middle of the night. That’s for sure.” Jenna hummed in thought. “The overstimulation puts you on thin ice, though.”


End file.
